I grew up in relative poverty, in an
inner city district that was quite poor and rundown, but so have many people;
I’m nothing remarkable.
I’m a Christian, and have been for more than 30 years now; on and off, I suppose. Now, in this phase of my life I first of all just want to serve the Lord with a whole heart and with all of my being. Whatever He wants me to do and however He wants me to live, that’s what I want to do, quite simply.
I’ve had years of unemployment and years
of depression, again on and off; perhaps one reality fed off the other. Now I
find myself in a better place both health and spirit wise, and in where I’m
going in life. Curiously enough, now that I find myself restored to a better
relationship with God, I also find myself wanting to achieve my longstanding
dream, which is to be a writer. My ambition to serve the Lord also fully coincides
with my desire to succeed as a writer; I don’t know why.
For some reason, I come up with idea
after idea, for stories, quiz shows, TV programmes and all kinds of
Christian-themed articles and books. Getting ideas for me is not a problem;
it’s sitting down and working on these ideas that can be problematic. What If I
work hard on a number of ideas, present them well, and none of them ever see
the light of day? Who wants to labour in vain, after all?
Of course, as a Christian I pray about
all of this and ask God to guide me towards both ambitions; to serve Him and to
work towards my goal of being a published author. But the nagging thoughts I
have can sometimes leave me feeling that I don’t have the right to success. Why
me, after all? And, like most creative people, I am plagued with all kinds of
doubts. But, the ideas still come and come, they never stop and I never run out
of things to write about. Whether I am good writer or not… well only you, dear
reader, can really answer that question.
My question is: can we serve God with a
whole heart and totally, while at the same time pursuing a goal or ambition
that may see us become successful? Aren’t these two things at odds with each
other? The answer that comes to me is that as long as we are honest about our ambitions,
and we do serve God in all we say and do and in the way we treat other people,
then so long as our ambitions are in line with God’s Word,
we can pursue our dreams like everyone else.
Don’t we all want to get on? I know I do,
and I think I am like many, many other people in this. We all have dreams that
give our lives meaning and focus. I
think it’s the dreams of little people – the myriad ordinary and everyday
people – that make the world go round.
And, after all’s said and done, I’m just
one of those ordinary people with a big dream that keeps me going and gets me
out of bed in the mornings. Most of the time, anyway!
Read more from Tim on his personal blog.
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